KEYS TO MY HEART

Exactly three years back, in the year 2003, in this month of May, I ran into Archana on DALnet. There were no sparks, bells or whistles like in the movies. It was just another night for me and I had come back to the channel after a long wait of 12 months. There were old friends, renewed friendships and finally a new girl by name Archana. We talked about her admission into PhD and I pretended to read her hand(virtually ofcourse) and predicted success. What happened in the next few days was not magic nor it was getting to know each other the old fashioned way. We were both subjected to a pleothora of feelings. There was a feeling of closeness and an odd feeling that we’ve known each other all our lives. We ran through our brief twenty year biographies to ensure that we were not lost friends from childhood. There were no specific links as such. We never lived at the same place at the same time so there was no way we could’ve known each other.

The feeling of closeness helped us in many ways. We were able to share things which we would’ve never been able to share with anyone else. Its never easy to confess to friends or family, it is easy for them get judgemental or prejudiced. Sentences like, “I told you so” and “you didnt listen to me” would be all too common. We were both strangers in our own miserable lives. It helped us to share our sorrows and set things right which had gone wrong. I’ve never believed in Fate or destiny. But the very reason that we’ve met each other in a crucial juncture in our life makes me want to change my mind. For me Archana has changed a lot of things. It was the single most influential event in my life which had changed the course of my life on its head. And it does make me want to believe in fate because I dont know what would’ve happened if I hadnt run into Archana at that point of time. Fate probably provided us an opportunity to get together. And what happened next was completely our doing.

What I had experienced over those first couple of weeks was comfort, happiness and most importantly trust. There were these moments when we typed each other the favourite parts from the books we read. And then discussed dialogues from movies. We had the most fun time together after a long long time. It has slowly dawned upon me that it does not matter whether you meet someone online or real. While it is possible to create an impression of something you are not online, it has never occurred to me that Archana could be dishonest. She was simple and honest. And it had never occurred to me that she could be lying about anything and she had no reason to. People who know Archana will probably agree with me on this. Her smile and simplicity are in many ways addictive. Once you talk to her, you would probably come back tomorrow to find her. And we always looked forward to talking to each other everyday.

Even though we were both sure of the kind of feelings we had for each other, we were circumspect because of the kind of past we have had. We wanted to be sure that we were not making another mistake. But the way things were going on, in the first couple of weeks, you could do nothing but throw caution to the wind. There were these co-incidences, not trivial ones like loving the same author or listening to same kind of music but it was a little deeper than that. There were these odd co-incidences like, eating raw onions, sugar with yogurt, eating meegada(the thick layer which forms on home made curd) with curry and rice and finally we shared the same initial “T”(Archana still teases me that it took me a T to realise all this). It prompted me to write a mail titled “Soulmates?!?!?!”. And I saw this as a sign, something that wasn’t just a chance occurance. I believed that this meeting was for a reason and the proposal has been already immortalised in the previous posts(Refer: My Meandering Muse). It has been an amazing transformation of our fortunes ever since. We not only found happiness in each other but a sense of meaning to our lives. So much so that we cant imagine spending our lives with anyone else.

And like I always say the first few years have been quite easy to handle. We were in madly love and time seemed to zip past us. Not that the love has reduced in anyway but we have had to make many more compromises and sacrifices in the past 6 months or so compared to the first 2years put together. We have never wanted to make this blog a relationship advice center for long distance relationships. What worked for us might not work for everyone and we’re hardly perfect to give everyone advice. Sometimes this has been a major struggle because in trying to keep this going, we’re hurting some people on the way. It would be hard for them to understand the importance of this relationship which is born on a platform where trust is feeble or non-existent. As much as we wish these things would go smoothly, its not as easy as it would all seem to be in the beginning of it all. But in the end all the trouble would only seem necessary to make a dream as good as this come true. .

And finally Archana, on this anniversary of our third year, I would like to thank you for all the love. May three become three hundred and may our love shine brighter than now. I am sure you have had to make a lot of sacrifices and things dont seem too good right now but I am sure in the end of it all, it would be worthwhile . I love you more than anything else. I hope the sun never sets on us and we keep going on and on. . Here’s for another great anniversary.

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